Monday, August 17, 2009

A slave for love...yours in particular

I feel like a run away slave for an escape from your torment I call "love"

I feel beat up after taking another punch to the face when he said "I can't go"

This is the second time he flaked on me

So I retaliated by telling him I no longer want to see him and I wasn't in love with him

It may seem as if I'm over reacting, but I'm not

I'm just officially fed up

I've been intimately speaking to this guy for an ongoing 14 months

and we still haven't established a committed relationship

So I feel lost, confused, misled, and emotionally taken advantage of

We met on June 24th, 2oo8 and hit it off from there

Everything was smooth until he broke my heart with his manipulative lies, deceitfulness, and his in denial thoughts

I honestly felt I was severely in love with this person

As he says he's in love with me

I no longer believe it

After all the mental abuse I tolerated this past year

I continuously tell myself "he's not worth it" "it's not meant to be" "move on"

But it's hard for me to initiate what my thoughts are telling me

I follow my heart instead and risk being hurt again

I guess I just love to hard =/